GREETINGS TICKET HOLDERS! I'm Biloxi Bill. Welcome to The Variety Theatre. I am sad to report Alligator Wrestling has been canceled and Dr Lonkler is missing.  Dr Lonkler is our longtime projectionist and chief alligator trainer. Please allow me on behalf of the staff and mismanagement to apologize for the cancellation and the few remaining alligators. Stand by as we make way for the next attraction and mount a search party for the good Dr.

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